Make yourself into the perfect date
Why is dating so hard? And why is the dating advice for men often so…vague?
Sure, there are some great ones out there — put yourself out there, mind your manners, and, for goodness sake, don’t talk about your exes. And then again, there are some misses.
When it comes to finding the “fish in the sea,” how do you go from being bumbling like Hitch’s Albert Brennaman to suave like Alex “Hitch” Hitchens?
One part is how you portray yourself. The other, more important part is how you view yourself.
Short of hiring yourself a “Date Doctor,” here are twelve dating tips for men from the experts at Mindvalley.
1. Get to know yourself
Many of us start listing off the kind of partner we want — beauty, brains, and whatnot. That’s a whole lot of pressure on the other person to meet our expectations.
Regardless if you’re casually dating, online dating, or looking for a life partner, step one towards happiness is to get to know yourself. It’s all about how to be authentic.
2. Switch off your emotional autopilot
Some dates really don’t leave us with good first impressions. When things don’t go our way, it becomes easy to operate emotionally on autopilot.
Awareness switches off the autopilot reactions. Instead, it allows you to respond from a space of calmness and composure.
3. Let perfectionism go
When we find our person, they seem to check off all the traits on our list. However, as we spend more time with our partners, we may start to realize certain traits rub us the wrong way.
So let go of this idea that you or your partner have to be perfect.
4. Identify your patterns
Dating patterns are what actually happens in the dynamic between yourself and other people. These patterns can be good, but they are often associated with being toxic or destructive.
5. Honor your needs
The need for connection is an integral part of being human. In that connection are healthy needs that provide love, respect, safety, consideration, and care.
6. Set your bold intention for love
You are an active co-creator of your love life. Ask yourself: If I could offer to be everything and anything to my partner, who would I be?
7. Use your charisma to connect
Charisma is a learnable trait. It can impact, inspire, and influence the people around you, making it easier to connect with your dates.
8. Make yourself more memorable
Break social scripts and ask questions that wake people up.
9. Bring out the best in your date
Dating is a two-way street. It’s about helping your date be their most clever, impressive, charismatic self.
10. Mirror your date
Mirroring helps with communication, boosts rapport, and makes your date feel heard and valued.
11. Master your gestures
Learning how to use your gestures and read your date can help you understand whether they’re into you or not.
12. Text with emojis
Texting can be misunderstood. Emojis add warmth and help messages land more positively.
Great love starts with you
The potential for a great dating experience starts with you.